Making It Brief

This post, that is. Sis has just started her fall swimming season with three meets scheduled this week. Talk about "diving" right in :)

Big Guy left with his geology class today for a three day trip to Death Valley. He has shown a greater desire to be organized, and began a written schedule of his days all on his own. This is wonderful, although Big Guy needs to careful to allow some flexibility in case something unforeseen happens like getting called into work.

Little Guy has had a great week overall. He seems more relaxed at home, leading to a desire to be playful and more affectionate. Little Guy attended a swim meet with us yesterday, and handled the noise and crowd fairly well. In order to help him stay regulated I made sure he had a nap beforehand, brought plenty of snacks, and took him on frequent walks. We are attending another meet later today; I hope Little Guy tolerates this one well!

I have a transition meeting set up today with Little Guy's new teacher, myself, and his current occupational therapist. I'll let you know what we decide.

"Driving" Me Crazy

Kids with Asperger's Syndrome can be sticklers when it comes to rules.

Game playing must be done with the strictest adherence to the guidelines.....or WATCH OUT.

Driving can the same way - even if the Asperger child is not the one behind the wheel.

I'd heard of cases where AS kids constantly peer over their parents' shoulders as they drive, checking that the car's speed doesn't exceed the speed limit. We never experienced this with Big Guy, as he was always off in his own little world (reading, playing Game Boy) while in the car. However, we are already starting to see an obsessive pattern emerging with Little Guy.

Little Guy knows where all of the stop signs are in our neighborhood, and this past week he has begun to warn me 1/2 block in advance to slow down and prepare to stop. This behavior has begun to translate to traffic lights, as well.

For example, just yesterday Little Guy had this to say as I pulled up to a stoplight, "Mama, the light is red now, so we can't go. We have to wait for it to turn green."

It's cute right now, but I have a feeling it could grow annoying very quickly!

And the Verdict Is.....

We received word today that Little Guy qualified for the district preschool.

Whew!

In order to qualify, a child must show one of the following: a) mild delays in three areas b) moderate delays in two areas, or c) severe delays in one area. Little Guy actually showed severe delays in two areas: adaptive (self-help) and social/emotional.

However, some things I've learned about the program concern me. The protocol this school uses is ABA based; Little Guy is used to the "Floortime" approach. What will be the best way to help him transition between these two programs? Also, the school uses the same program for every child, regardless of their disability. This means my son will have the same curriculum as someone with Down's Syndrome or cerebral palsy. Each of these disabilities are quite different from another; is the school prepared and willing to make the necessary adjustments for Little Guy's strengths and weaknesses? There are certain things which help my child stay regulated and cooperative such as counting to five when preparing to transition to a new activity. Will the teacher incorporate this simple action in her classroom? There are also three levels the children can be placed in; level one is basically one-on-one isolation, whereas level three is in a more regular classroom setting with several peers. My understanding is they like to place new students in level one to begin with, but would this really be the best level for Little Guy as we are trying to get him to interact with larger groups of children?

Although I'm happy with today's news, I've been left with many questions. I look forward to meeting with Little Guy's new teacher next week to discuss what the future holds as we prepare for this big transition.

Wednesday on Thursday

I'm such a slacker.

I totally blew off my "Wonderful Wednesday" report; so today, you'll be getting Wednesday on Thursday.

Anybody confused yet?

My wonderful news of the week has to do with the behavior of both of our "Aspie" boys during our recent mini vacation.

This is Big Guy hungrily checking out a chocolate fountain during our recent trip to Las Vegas.

Our kids had Monday off of school, so we decided to plan an overnight trip to Vegas. First of all, Big Guy chose to come with us. Yeah!! Now that he's 18, he doesn't often elect to go on family outings. And not only did Big Guy come with us, but he actually participated in the family activities. Double yeah!! Big Guy tends to be somewhat reclusive; even while at home, he is often tucked away in his room reading books or playing video games. Although the books and Nintendo DS came along on the trip, Big Guy was very good about only using them while we were driving in the car. It was so much fun to have him join us; we really enjoyed Big Guy's quirky sense of humor that he applies to many situations.

Little Guy also weathered the trip well - something that does not happen on a regular basis when we travel. He did have his moments, but was able to stay fairly regulated most of the time. I was a little concerned with how Little Guy would handle our visit to an indoor adventure park, but luckily there were no crowds and our toddler actually enjoyed the rides instead of becoming overwhelmed. This was a big step for him!

Tomorrow is our eligibility meeting; I'll post later in the day with a report on how things went.

Day of Reckoning

We have word on Little Guy's qualification meeting.

It will be held this Friday.

My feeling is Little Guy will show deficiencies in the Emotional/Behavioral and Self Help portions of the tests. In order to qualify, he must be at least moderately behind in both areas.

All we can do now is wait.....and hope.

What's the Difference?

Many times as I've described Asperger traits to other parents - especially those who have toddlers - they express that their child does some of those things too. So, what's the difference between a tantrum and a meltdown?

This is Little Guy having a major meltdown during a recent family outing.

The truth is, some of the problem behaviors found on the autism spectrum are similar to what many caretakers see during the "terrible twos"; the difference is in the intensity and frequency of the autistic behaviors. A good example of this would be Little Guy's eating habits. Many toddlers are notorious for being picky eaters at times, but I can count ON ONE HAND the foods I know my son will eat. In fact, Little Guy is so sensitive that if his preferred foods are not a certain brand he WILL NOT EAT them. Someone once suggested if I let him go hungry for a while, Little Guy would eat food out of hunger. THIS IS NOT THE CASE. Little Guy is not refusing foods to be contrary or stubborn; most foods seem repulsive to him due to the sight, texture, smell, or other sensory issues. No amount of bribing, tricking, or cajoling has helped remedy this behavior. It impacts our family on a daily basis; it affects my shopping, our choices of restaurants when we go out to eat as a family, and how I plan for trips.

Another way to gauge if a child is at risk for being diagnosed with an autism spectrum disorder is whether he has the majority of the markers, or just a few. For example, Middle Guy was also a picky eater and liked to line things up as a toddler - two markers experts look for in diagnosing autism. Yet, Middle Guy exhibited no other concerning behavior, and it is very clear at this time that he is definitely not anywhere close to being on the spectrum.

So again, when a child has a few behaviors that are similar to those on the spectrum there's no reason to automatically worry. A good indication of concern is how many of the behaviors a child exhibits, how often they occur, and how intense the behaviors are. Another good question to ask yourself is if the behavior impacts or disrupts your family on a daily basis. If so, it could indicate an underlying problem such as an autistic spectrum disorder.

However, if you feel uncomfortable or unsure about your child's behavior, the best thing to do is to talk about it with your child's doctor or a developmental specialist; because the earlier a diagnosis is made, the better the outcome can be.

WONDERFUL Wednesday

Things have been MUCH better with our Asperger boys this week, so I didn't have to look too far to find "wonderful" things to report.

Big Guy is showing great initiative in his newest college class, CIS (computer information systems). Much of the work is done outside the classroom setting, with regular deadlines set for the chapters. Big Guy has completed each section well before it's due, and has even set aside time on his "off" days to go to the computer lab and work on his assignments. He was also called in to work four days last week, after not working at all the week before.

Little Guy made some progress with eating. During Sunday dinner, he sat at the table with us and actually ate one of the foods the rest of the family was eating - rice. We usually end up bringing out yogurt or applesauce after we offer him whatever the rest of the family is eating, so this was a big step. Little Guy is still wanting to sit on the toilet 1-2 times a day, and I'm thinking about breaking out the underwear again in another week or so. Hopefully, he's grown more accustomed to the toilet and won't feel so anxious this time around.

It's been two weeks and two days since Little Guy's preschool evaluation, and I have yet to hear from the school. I put in a phone call today and hope it will get the ball rolling. With Little Guy's third birthday only 5 weeks away, we are cutting it close for our goal of four weeks for transition between the toddler and preschool programs.

Reunion

My husband's side of the family had a reunion yesterday at a natural springs resort.

There were some family members in attendance who live several hours away, and I was anxious to "show off" my children to them - especially Little Guy, as they have not seen him very often.

Unfortunately, things did not go as I had hoped. This is how Little Guy spent most of the day:.....running away and avoiding other people. That, and crying.

The few times when Little Guy was with everyone, he was very disregulated. He cried in the pool whenever he was accidentally splashed. He cried when the group played games and the noise level grew too loud. He cried when the other kids inadvertently bumped him. He cried when it was time too eat because we didn't have yogurt.

He cried a LOT.

And when he wasn't crying, he sought to distance himself from the crowd:

Maybe things didn't go according to plan, but it did give me the opportunity to explain Little Guy's diagnosis to some of the other relatives. They were very understanding and asked many questions about what Asperger's Syndrome is and how it affects our family.

I just hope that next time we get together, Little Guy won't be as anxious. I would really like the extended family members to see the endearing, funny, and intelligent personality that can be often obscured by the layers of his autistic spectrum disorder.

But it's comforting to know our family is prepared to accept Little Guy - no matter what side is showing itself.

Searching for Wonderful

Today's "Wonderful Wednesday" has been difficult for me. We've had a trying week with our Aspie boys, and I've really had to dig deep and get creative to find the positive things I'd like to post about them.

Little Guy's disposition is definitely a happier one since we've returned home, although he is having a hard time if I'm not here. He continues to show some interest in using the toilet but only on his terms. Little Guy also tried a new food at his class yesterday - french toast sticks. He ended up eating three servings!

As for Big Guy........he continues to stay on top of his class schedule and homework, although he's gotten some very poor scores on a few of his assignments due to not listening to and following through with the teacher's instructions. We have also managed to avoid any further haircut issues with Big Guy (see last Wednesday's post for details) :)

I know these events are not earth shattering......but it's the best I could do with a bad week. I'm hoping the coming days will be much better!

The Good, the Bad, and the Ugly

We were out of town with our family this weekend and had a chance to experience the good, the bad, and the ugly when it came to the behavior of our youngest son.

THE GOOD: Or perhaps I should say the "incredible". There was an 18 hour span of time when Little Guy had a dry diaper. Every time I went to change him and discovered he was dry, Little Guy wanted to sit on the toilet. It was crazy that we made strides with potty training while traveling; usually, this is the time when toddlers regress.

THE BAD: Little Guy has a hard time sleeping away from home, and this time was no exception. Although I stayed in his room, he had two very restless nights.

THE UGLY: This describes Little Guy's regulation while we were away. We really struggled with anxiety issues, and Little Guy ended up screaming and acting oppositional most of the time. I had my husband with me; even with two of us we felt we could barely handle him, his behavior was so disregulated.

We had been discussing the possibility of an extended family later this year, but after this weekend we are seriously re-evaluating the situation. It may have to wait until Little Guy gets a little older and is better equipped to handle the many uncertainties that a vacation brings to his schedule.

Fabulous Friday

I hope everyone is having a fabulous fall Friday!

Once again, it's time to share good news about my Aspie boys. I'm keeping it brief, as our family is headed out of town today to support Sis in an important competition.

Big Guy did something very encouraging on the social front; he went on another date. He and another student in his Geology struck up a conversation after class that was just too interesting to complete in a short time, so Big Guy suggested they continue talking over lunch. Apparently, they continued to have a great time while eating; when my son came home, he was pretty proud of himself :)

As for Little Guy, I was worried after Monday's meltdowns that his disregulated behavior would continue into the week. Thankfully, things have been much better on the home front! I'm still waiting to hear back from the preschool concerning qualification.

Here's hoping the rest of the weekend proves "fabulous"!