Although we live in the same city as Big Guy, we seldom see him.
We might get a phone call every 10-14 days, or, if we're lucky, we'll get a visit once or maybe twice a month. Maintaining personal relationships just isn't a priority for those with Asperger's Sydrome, as evidenced by Big Guy's behavior. Even when he lived at home, our oldest son seldom interacted with the family. He would often seclude himself in his room or choose solitary activities to occupy his time.
On Monday evening, Big Guy stopped by for a visit.
When I say "visit", it's the loosest form of the word. His visits really don't consist of much "visiting". Rather, Big Guy usually plugs himself into a video game and finds a quiet corner to occupy while the rest of us interact with each other. There are two things our son is passionate about: reading and video games. I'm an avid reader myself, which has helped me to connect with Big Guy by having discussions about various authors and books. However, I didn't feel that was enough, so several years ago, I decided I would learn to play some of the video games my son loves. About once a year or so, I choose a game recommended by Big Guy and play it through. Some of these have been from the Pokemon series. Big Guy is able to use his expertise and knowledge to guide me through the game, which gives me another way to connect with him.
So, this is pretty much how Monday night went: Big Guy came and ate a quick bite of dinner with us, then plugged into his DS while Middle Guy and I finished a movie together. After the two younger boys went to bed, Big Guy hung around to help me through some levels in the latest Pokemon game.
You know, I've actually come to enjoy these sessions with Big Guy...and I have to admit the games have been fun, as well. It may not be a "typical" way to spend and evening with an adult child...but it works for us :)